A Delicious Proposal

A DELICIOUS PROPOSAL

I have been giving this some thought. People are out. Though they’re the worst offenders , eating for instance people, animals and plants. But you can’t eat people and be CIVILIZED, no! Animals are out now, being they’re people too. Now vegetables are out because they have feelings too. So that leaves dirt, which never hurt a fly. Plants drink water. Bad. Animals drink water, eat plants and other animals and some humans too. Bad. People I said eat almost about everything. Bad, bad, bad! 

So to be truly a good person, that leaves one with a diet of DIRT. But as I said before dirt never hurt anybody. So why eat dirt? Because it’s dumb. It won’t protest, so no one will know. Dirt’s the thing to cure all the evils of the earth. SO LET ALL EAT DIRT AND BE DONE WITH IT. Of course in the end it will have its revenge and bury us all.