Ipso Facto Or Whatever

Descartes was such a clever guy,

In trying to figure things out,

The rule, that he chose to apply,

Allowed considerable doubt.

Now this became a problem when

He wondered if he was all there,

Because if he was not—what then,

And if so—was he anywhere?

He came to a conclusion, though

It isn’t one to which I’d come,

Depending on what he did know,

He said, “Cogito, ergo sum,”

Which in translation has to mean

That if “I think therefore I am,”

So, that on thought he had to lean,

Which was a dubious program.